Saturday, September 25, 2010

The Naming of Cats

The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter, It isn't just one of your holiday games;
You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter
When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.
(Patch- the other "prison brother")

First of all, there's the name that the family use daily,
Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James,
Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey -
All of them sensible everyday names.

There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,
Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames:
Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter -
But all of them sensible everyday names.
But I tell you, a cat needs a name that's particular,
A name that's peculiar, and more dignified,
Else how can he keep his tail perpendicular,
Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?

Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,
Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat,
Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum -
Names that never belong to more than one cat.

But above and beyond there's still one name left over,
And that is the name that you never will guess;
The name that no human research can discover -
But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.

When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:
His ineffable effable
Deep and inscrutable singular Name.

- T.S. Eliot

(from "Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats")
Dagda- my mighty hunter, and one of the two "prison boys"  He and his brother Patch were born at a correctional facility near here, and raised and fed in the yard by the inmates, but were going to be killed come fall/winter when the inmates weren't outside to feed them anymore. We rescued two of them - friends took the rest.  
Tequila, aka "Fat Cat"  - having put on about 20 lbs since                     
two abscessed teeth were removed this summer                                Katie, aka "Stinky cat  She NEEDS a
                                                                                                        dental visit

Bug - cat with a disproportionately large body and tiny little head.  Also appears to have had several different fathers.  Her mother was a hussy.
Oreo. She was one of a pair of sisters, with Doublestuff looking similar, but with a much bigger white stripe underneathe.  Dubby disappeared one year when we were on vacation, and all these years later, we miss her still.   And then, there's AZ.  Who is growing, slowly, but who has totally grown under my heart. She's snuggly and purry and lovable.
I don' t know how we ended up with all these cats. I really love dogs best. But they do add immeasureable love and happiness to my life despite that. But please, NO MORE CATS FOR ME.


Peruby said...

This poem brought back some memories. My daughter and her friends watched "CATS" over and over and over again for a couple of years.

woodland_oasis said...

OMG, hilarious :) We have 3 cats(I don't even LIKE cats!) and have nicknames for each as well...funny how you do that with cats and not dogs!