Oh No, Not Again?!

Damn. It happened again. And I am so torn. Yep, another kitten "found" us. Why? Why do they find US? Why can't they find some other sap? And why, why, why aren't we the kind of people who can walk away from it, and hope and pray someone ELSE will take it home? Why does it have to be US?

My daughter called from a gas station ten miles away the other night, and before she even said more than, "Moooommmm?????" I knew. I heard it meowing pitifully, and loudly. I knew it. Did I tell her NO? No. Of course not. Did I say "yes"? No, but by NOT saying no, I DID say yes, and there's no need to even pretend I didn't. Do I WANT another cat? ABSOLUTELY NOT. We have 6. We had 7, and Gracie, who looked eerily similar to this kitten, died not that long ago, and there's still a hole I don't WANT filled. I miss Gracie - she was special. And, there's the practical. Another cat means another animal to take to the vet for shots, to be spayed, in case of illness. One of the cats we have cost me over $400.00 this spring to have abscessed teeth removed. What could I do? Not pay it, and let her be in pain, or starve to death because she couldn't eat? Of course not. But did I HAVE $400. to spend on a cat's teeth? Of course not.

And so, it begins again. The dilemma. At least for me. My kids have no such problems, because they just see a kitten in need of rescuing. And there is a part of my heart that is glad I have raised kids who would not turn their backs on a clearly abandoned animal. Oh, they know better than to ask to bring an animal home, like when the neighbor's dog just recently had puppies. With 4 dogs, 6 cats, and my own silly menagerie of chickens, we don't NEED, nor can we really take care of, fairly, another animal voluntarily. We DON"T live on a farm - we live in the middle of town. Just like with kids, I know my limit with animals. It reassures me that I do, because it means I won't be one of those crazy animal hoarder people who mean well, but keep taking in more animals than they can take care of, until they have 57 cats living in their house and dirty disgusting cans of half eaten cat food lying around. Gross. But, seriously, 6 cats sometimes seems unnecessary, and truly, not all 6 were even by choice.

And if we keep this one, making it 7 again, IT would not be by choice.

AND - I found a home for it, where it will be loved and adored, and where I am going to have to take it.

But...but....but...but...

she really IS cute. And purry. And cuddly. And grateful to be rescued. And it's HARD to be practical and have a hard heart when you know everyone in your home is going to hate you for it.

And when she's got that little pumpkin colored stripe on the back of her head, just like Gracie did.

And when she looks so darn cute sticking her head into my coffee and tea mugs.

But...I don't WANT another cat...do I?