Saturday, May 21, 2011

Life Goes On

     The sun is shining this morning!  Yes, that IS worthy of an announcement, given the number of days it has rained lately.And the number of days in the upcoming forecast calling for MORE rain.  Today is, in fact, the only day NOT scheduled for moisture. Hallelujah.  For real.  Webbing is growing between my toes, and I feel slightly soggy.  (Not nearly as soggy as I was last Saturday, after spending two hours in the pouring rain at my son's outdoor college graduation. Do you suppose that some, just some, of the outrageous tuition money we sent them 4 years running might have been funneled into renting tents for that momentous occasion? Guess not....)
     Today is the first day of... um, well, a return to normalcy, however temporary that may be in MY life. It feels good. Really good.
     Today, my brother is not in the hospital. No one I know is. And he is healing well. Other than hearing loss, which may, unfortunately, be permanent, but I think it's a small price to pay for all he went through.  His body and neck brace have been exchanged for a soft neck collar for the next three weeks. And life goes on. 
     My father has passed away. His calling hours are tomorrow, but I'm not too concerned. I am so relieved that his struggle is over, that the misery, mentally and physically, are done for him. He is in heaven with my mom, and there will be no more second guessing on our part as to whether we are doing enough, whether he is in the wrong place and we should move him, etc. I do not need to make any more sad visits to the nursing home to sit by his bed and wish that this were not his life anymore. Life goes on.
     EMT class, and both tests are done.  Those Tuesday and Thursday nights, from 6-10, learning all those acronyms like AVPU, BSI, OPQRST, SAMPLE, etc. and stuffing my head with how many compressions per minute per child vs adults, when to insert an orapharyngeal vs a nasophryngeal airway, etc. are over. I passed the lab portion and took my final written State test Thursday night. I think I did well, and think I passed, and whatever happens now (I have to wait 6 weeks to know for sure and to get my certification), it's all done.  
     My son was driven to Baltimore, 6 hours away, following our Thursday night test, to join his Senior class on their trip. He could not leave when they did Thursday morning because of the test, Thursday night,  so we sped him down there,deposited him at 6 am Friday morning, turned around and came home, were home by noon yesterday. That's done. 
     College graduation for my oldest is done. His mini-vacation of three days is done, and he is back on campus for his summer job, which began yesterday. High school graduation for my second son is still a few weeks away, as is the end of the school year, and beginning of summer, for me. 
     I don't have pneumonia anymore. I don't even have bronchitis. I DO have a cold, and could not taste my Starbucks coffee I treated myself to yesterday morning on the way home from Baltimore, but it's only a cold. And, only a head and throat cold, not even a chest cold. No dr. visit required, just more vitamins, and some sunshine will help speed it on its way. That, and some extra sleep, and some lack of stress. 
     Wait, I have TIME for extra sleep now. That's cool. And as I look around me, and ahead of me, there seems to be no stress in sight. That's also very cool. When I look back at what the past five months have brought, and from which I have been delivered into this bright, sunshine-filled May morning, today, I am filled with so much gratitude that I don't know what to do with it all. I not only survived, I rose above. I wanted to quit, but did not. I did the best I could, sometimes failing, but continually trying. I loved hard, I showed up each day, and got through. 
     I think I'm going to simply go sit on my front steps in the sunshine, pour one more cup of coffee this morning, and soak it all in, while I make my TO-DO list for the days and weeks ahead of me. There's more rain forecast for tomorrow, so maybe today, I'll mow the grass. I have time for it, and time to do normal things just seems GOOD. Better than anything, as a matter of fact. Life goes on, and it is good.


Peruby said...

Wow! I am reeling from reading about your past five months. I guess reading about it bit by bit every morning in your posts, it didn't all sink in. What a ride! Glad you came out okay on the other side. Smooth sailing!

Sherry Sutherby said...

And all the people said...Amen! I hope you were clothed in grace on Sunday. I thought of you. BTW, I got to my state boards with EMT, and bailed. I felt I was going to use the wrong tube...funny you should mention that! :) My instructor actually called and told me I was doing fine, but I felt otherwise. Sounds like you are doing very well...:~) P.S. I agree about the graduation tents. Can't imagine not having a back up plan~!